As if it’s not bad enough that I get hundreds of spam emails every day–I also have to delete a ton of spam comments on this blog on a daily basis, too. I know there are spam filters out there, but so far I haven’t found one that eliminates enough spam to lighten my load without also torching legitimate emails and comments. Sometimes the comments are downright hilarious, so why not share the wealth? I’ll leave all of the typos and grammar snafus intact, because that’s half the fun.

“Reading this info So i’m glad to convey that I’ve a very just right uncanny feeling I discovered exactly what I needed.” It’s uncanny how you felt that. I’m feeling uncanny just reading about it.

“You are carrying out a pretty cool job.” That is a fact.

“hi!,I really like your writing so much! proportion we be in contact more about your article on won’t name the site?” I am all about proportion, so, yes.

“this web-site is something that’s necessary on the internet, somebody with a small originality.” It’s not the size of your originality that’s important, it’s what you do with it.

“Continue to maintain up the excellent operate.” I’ll do my best to…whatever you said.

“Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your point. You clearly know what youre talking about, why waste your intelligence on just posting videos to your weblog when you could be giving us something informative to read?” Why, indeed?

“You must take component in a contest for one of the most effective blogs on the internet.” Oh, I do take component for that–don’t kid yourself.

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“There’s noticeably a bundle to know about this. I assume you produced specific nice points in functions also.” I wouldn’t assume any such thing.

“What i do not understood is in fact how you’re now not actually a lot more well-preferred than you may be now. You are so intelligent.” I often wonder the same thing myself.

“Awesome submit! I could keep an in eye on the blog.” You could, but you won’t.

“I don’t know who you’re but certainly you are going to a well-known blogger in the event you are not already.” Fer sure!

“Thank you for the auspicious writeup. It in fact was a entertainment account it. Glance advanced to far delivered agreeable from you! By the way, how can we communicate?” I don’t know, ask your warden—I’m sure there’s a process in place.

“I have to confess that i sometimes get bored to learn the entire thing however i think you possibly can add some value.” I know. Learning the entire thing is SO.BORING.

“Next time I read a blog, Hopefully it does not disappoint me as much as this one. I mean, Yes, it was my choice to read, however I really believed you would probably have something helpful to say. All I hear is a bunch of crying about something you could fix if you were not too busy seeking attention.” Nailed me.Thanks for the insight, Tonie Waffle. If that IS your real name…

“work hard until you reach success” Fortune cookie platitudes from a spammer. Love it.

“I must thank you for the efforts you’ve put in writing this blog. I really hope to check out the same high-grade content from you later on as well. In fact, your creative writing abilities has motivated me to get my very own site now” I know we’re all looking forward to reading that.

“Undeniably believe that which you stated.” Undeniably.

“Your favorite justification seemed to be on the net the simplest factor to bear in mind of.” You have no idea just how simple my favorite justifications are.

“I acquire in truth appreciated account your blog posts. At any rate I will be subscribing on your broadcast and even I attainment you get right of entry to constantly quickly.” Ummm…what?

“Woah! I’m really enjoying the template/theme of this site.” Dude! Awesome!

“Is this diet worth your time?” Hell, no. Except, yes.

“Where else may just I am getting that type of information written in such a perfect approach?” Nowhere, amiright?

“Top Achievers are improvisors, not perfectionists. If you want to create more success in your life you have to move forward not knowing all the Answers.” Damn! Spammers are so enlightened these days!

“I just could not leave your site prior to suggesting that I really loved the usual info an individual provide on your guests?” Thanks for the suggestion!

“I am on the 1st day of a auto detox diet plan. I haven’t had a affair to eat all day and I’m STARVING!!” Wow, I’d be starving too, but thanks to that affair I had, I’m actually kind of full.

“Perhaps you can write subsequent articles relating to this article.” That idea is so genius! I think I WILL write subsequent articles relating to this article.

“What’s up, I check your blog like every week. Your humoristic style is witty, keep it up!” I was actually feeling pretty good about this one until I saw the commenter’s spammy email address, LOL.

“I appreciate, cause I discovered just what I used to be taking a look for.” I hope we all find what we used to be looking for.

“certainly like your web-site but you need to test the spelling on several of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling issues and I in finding it very troublesome to inform the reality however I will surely come back again.” Is it ever NOT troublesome to inform the reality?

“The worst way to miss someone is, he nearly in the side, konwing you can not have them.” Still trying to figure out “he nearly in the side.”

“Are you really that ignorant that you’re going to pour of of able to only the just and as it is so simple to achieve results.” I don’t know if I’m that ignorant, but clearly you are.