Design Star Season 7 cast member Britany Simon is gorgeous–that’s first and foremost. The word bombshell comes to mind. Looking at this picture, I’m expecting a fair amount of baby talk to come out of her mouth:

I just got back from the mall!

I just got back from the mall!

But then I see Britany’s audition video–very polished, BTW–and there’s not so much baby talk as there is Valley Speak. So we’re still at the mall, but it’s the one in the high end part of town. She’s owning a lot of authority than I hadn’t previously given her credit for.

Britany’s profile practically writes itself. The girl has serious style, but her portfolio’s like a broken record, repeating the same elements over and over in different scenarios. Take these dining chairs, for instance…

We have them with white seats:


In a black and white awning stripe:


And a trellis print:


That vase above, the one that looks like a tissue holder filled with faux flowers? It sees plenty of action too:



Pretty kitchen, but that rug's a bit bath mat-y.

But the worst is that Britany’s never met a chevron pattern she didn’t like. She’d especially like to marry a black and white chevron rug, if her portfolio is any indication:




Britany’s portfolio is every bit as gorgeous as she is. But I know a crutch when I see one…when one third of your portfolio features chevron patterns, it’s time to switch things up a bit! Will she be able to design on the fly without depending on the same patterns over and over?

And will she do something on Design Star that will make me forget I ever saw this boring travertine stuff in her portfolio?


Spendy, but boring.



Stay tuned after the cast critiques for Room Fu’s predictions about the next season of Design Star, premiering May 29th on HGTV.