Zzzzzzz. Zzzzzzz. Zzzzzzz. Huh, wha?
Is that cute John Gidding playing guest judge on Design Star tonight? Wake me when he comes back onscreen.
CHALLENGE: Design a kitchen for a Sears catalog cover in two days, featuring Kenmore appliances. Inspiration comes in the form of regional food baskets, with each designer selecting some kind of beige food item.
Oh Lord, what a boring episode of Design Star that was last night. This time I blame economics and the sweet cash infusion that is product placement for the snore. After all, you can be the greatest, most innovative designer in the world, but you are still going to have to churn out a lowest-common-denominator style of kitchen if it’s going to be slapped on the cover of a Sears catalog. You’re not going to get away with eye-popping color drama like you can if you are shooting for IKEA. You’re not incorporating sleek Euro-style cabinets or technicolor Aga ranges or some kind of funky retro fridge. Anything cool or unique is immediately tossed out the window of opportunity because Sears is not a rock-the-design-boat, blow-out-the-stops kind of company. It’s not what they are, it’s not what they do. Consequently, we have two white/beige kitchens that would never fall into the category of Wow. The closest thing we get to Wow is the (blue? purple? purple-y-blue?) island the Red Team incorporates into the mix, and the revelation that finalist Courtland Bascon is S-T-R-A-I-G-H-T.
Gay boys the world over are scratching their heads and checking the functionality of their gaydar.
It’s so ironic that this season’s kitchen challenge features the support of professional flooring, appliance, and cabinetry installers for a faux kitchen, whereas real-life homeowners of kitchen challenges past were subjected to vent hoods hanging by a thread, unfinished tile backsplashes, and incomplete remodels. While I applaud this type of assistance, it’s a buzzkill that–because of the Sears aspect–this season’s designers aren’t able to capitalize on this break by doing more innovative design plans.