I almost fell asleep Monday night during Design Star’s kitchen snore.
We had one ugly kitchen
…followed by another ugly kitchen
I have never been so underwhelmed in my whole life.
Strangely, when Kellie found this mush-colored, been-on-the-market-at-least-six-years penny tile, she exclaimed, “I’m so excited, I could pee my pants!”
Tile I would pee my pants over:
Kevin and Meg had a good thing going until they started overstyling the space.
The judges don’t seem to mind that the fridge is 100 miles from the sink and stove. Guest judge Paula Deen acts like Meg invented the pegboard pot storage idea.
As if Julia Child isn’t famous for it.
Julia’s wall was made even more famous in a movie.
Meryl Streep was in it, so maybe you saw it. I’m guessing Meg saw it a couple of times.
Leslie and Tyler created what would be a decent-looking kitchen in real life, but was a dud on camera.
Tyler couldn’t resist something shiny.
I was wrong when I thought Tyler was going to play the diva of the bunch, but I hit the nail on the head when I predicted he’d be undone by the shiny.
After all of this boring crap, we were treated to the premiere of Donna Destroys Decorates Dallas, featuring Design Star Season 1 finalist and Dallas designer, Donna Moss. I only saw five minutes, but here’s how I felt the entire time this was on my teevee:
Take a cup of Kardashian mom and daughters storefront reality show setup, add 4 cups Jerseylicious-styled Texas stereotypes, then combine that with the train wreckitude that is Toddlers & Tiaras. After you fold in a year’s supply of Mary Kay Cosmetics applied in one shot to Donna’s face, stir in heaping helpings of leopard print and gaudy-a-go-go, voila! You have Donna Decorates Dallas.
“Undone by the shiny!” LOL! kg
I was seriously underwhelmed by this episode. When it was done, my first thought was, “Why oh why isn’t Cathy gone yet?” followed by, “I can’t wait to read Room Fu’s recap!”
My guess is Cathy will be in the final 4, possibly the final 4, but no further than that. I think they’re keeping her around for some drama while the rest of the contestants come out of their shells and really bring it on, which Cathy and her public television circa 1995 decorating style and persona won’t be able to compete with.
I really love your recaps. They are one of the highlights of my blog reading week.
For the judges I’d like to borrow a line from Genevieve — “You made me mad!”
I liked the pegboard concept (have had one in my house for over 10 years) but that’s the outstanding innovative and creative thing in the room and kudo’s to Meg? I don’t think so.
Kathy spent half the night telling us what a great stylist she is but when she was finished, it looked like her grocery bag had done some projectile vomiting and you hoped none of it got on you. And you picked her to win this week’s camera challenge? Not on my tv she didn’t! I did like her exit line, “What’s for dinner?” but I liked it when I heard it on HeeHaw too but at least they made me laugh. Not laughing.
Shucks, Kirsten–thanks for the awesome note! Made my day 🙂
Yes, we had the same thoughts on Design Star. And yes….I think HGTV is trying to tap into the shock reality tv market by shows like Donna Decorates Dallas. Upcoming is a show with Dina Manzo from Jew Jersey Housewives. They probably think their low ratings are do to not having sensationalized tv….do they not get it that their dropping ratings are due to poor content of late?
Luv the blog-I have a nit to pick: it’s Julia Child. Singular-no plural
I’m terrified to watch Donna Decorates Dallas. (I still will, of course. It’s on my DVR.) Fun fact: my buddy Alan watched it and said that the abysmal editing is apparent to anyone who lives here; apparently they string sentences together while shots outside the car window are all over this sizeable town.
Also, I want to beat Cathy about the head with a fake baguette.
Christ on a cracker. I just watched Donna Decorates Dallas. Or as it shall be known from now on: Donna Desecrates Dallas.
Thanks Aladdin, made the change!
Krista, you’re not signing up for Donna’s next makeover?