My apologies to the 90 or so Room Fu clients whose holiday postcards were returned to me recently. Reason? “Sender address needs to be on top left corner.”

On a postcard?

This is just wrong on so many levels:

  1. A bazillion similarly-inadequate postcards made it past Scrooge and on to the recipient. Why were 90 singled out for rejection?
  2. If this is some new rule resulting from terrorist activities involving the post, can we not recognize the fact that this is a friggin’ postcard? Where is the anthrax supposed to be hiding?
  3. You have the audacity to print “Happy Holidays” while cancelling my stamp and then pull this kind of Scrooge move?
  4. The killer of all? I printed a note about my change of address on the postcard, which is how the post office was able to return them to me. So…the return address was good enough for them to return the postcards to me, but not good enough to deliver them to the recipient. Nice. And oh, so logical.
  5. Evidently the postal service now has quotas to meet–like cops busting speed traps around the end of each month–and this is their new method of selling more stamps.

It was bad enough that I’d accidentally misspelled the word “divine.” (Devine? Can you believe I did that? I was the third grade spelling bee champ in my class, for gawd’s sake. Man…do I speak Southern or what?)

After this stack was returned, it just felt like the whole project was doomed. But I vow not to let this dampen my holiday cheer. In case I am not successful at convincing the postmaster to go ahead and deliver my mail, here are my holiday wishes:

Oh…and one more thing…those snowflakes are made out of…

…wait for it…

…wait for it…

lamps.

Happy Festivus!